So fellow Deviants, I have been away for some time, mostly because Ive been working, partly because my creativity has come to a halt I suppose you could say. Im very complicated as a human. One minute my mind could be set on a vacation in the tropics and then at the last moment it switches to a night out on the town with friends. Its been something Ive dealt with for a long time, ever since I can remember. I used to think nothing of it, until it started to affect me in ways I wouldn't wish upon anyone. Someone told me the other day that I scare them because Im a free spirit. My response, "You're only as free as the one you love." Normally my reaction would of been something like "I know its great and I love it!" Why such a love inspired response? Thats the complicated part. This is a person I have liked for sometime, and I even dated this person for a little stretch of time, about 2-3 months. I really liked them, a lot, and they liked me too. I messed up, my retarded adhd infected free spirited brain bailed out, and even though I didnt show how much I was hurting, I tried to be strong, I fucked my heart up bad. Ive since decided that will not do and Im trying to get back to where I was. Do you think I will make it? Wish me luck. Otherwise Im in great spirits. Doing what I call me time, staying away from relationships for now. Taking my selfish time. Is that so wrong?